Tuesday, December 30, 2008

Cranky old writer

Today's post is random rambling about things that drive me nuts, which is why I'm wearing my cranky pants.

1. Lose/loose - get it right people. The two words are NOT interchangeable. When you LOSE weight, you get LOOSE pants. Seriously, that makes me crazy.

I went out for a brisk walk yesterday, and this provided me with #2 and #3.

2. If you have kids, great. But your kids Christmas scooters (there were NINE of them) don't belong all over the sidewalk where I'm trying to keep up a certain pace. Don't you teach your kids the value of their toys? Or was that your way of telling your neighbors "screw you?" And don't pretend like you didn't see them. You were standing in the yard talking with your other slacker friends.

3. Keep your giant, slobbering dogs on a leash. I like dogs, but not when they come running at me. I don't know your dogs. I don't know if they're nice or mean. And I don't want my crotch sniffed, especially when I don't know whose crotch they sniffed last. (That's six degrees of separation even Kevin Bacon would back away from.)

And lastly, YOU KIDS STAY OFF OF MY LAWN. That is all. Now go read a book. Or tell me what makes you cranky?


  1. You are so funny. I'm probably guilty of 1 and I'm with you on 2 and 3. I have a dog but am still not a dog person. Keep your dog on a leash please. Almost everything makes me cranky.

  2. You make me laugh so now I'm not cranky. :D

  3. BWAHAHAHAHA I love when you get cranky. Awesome.

    I have lots o' things that make me cranky, but I made a promise this week to myself not to say mean/rude things about anyone.

    yeah, it hasn't worked out too well so far...haha

  4. Anonymous10:13 AM

    Thanks for making me laugh! My sick hubs is making me cranky...to the point I suggested he was malinger. I know...bad. He's sick but my god, man up, will ya!

    lose v loose, huh? never had that problem. the one that drive me NUTS is "irregardless". NO. SUCH. WORD. Thankyouverymuch

  5. Working in a bookstore, I dread the kids section. It amazes me that kids are allowed to run around screaming while parents 'chit chat' with each other. My TOP PET PEEVE is that kids are allowed to leave piles of books all over the store. How can you expect your kids to pick up their room, when you, as an adult, don't ask them to put the books away AND you don't bother to put them away yourself?

  6. Haha, I think you already read what makes me cranky.
    Sorry about the kiddos. I was trying to control mine today in the store. Erk.
    Love your sentence for lose/loose.

  7. Nothing makes me cranky. I am zenish.

    okay. I lied. People, when it is freezing outside and I am walking a puppy in the rain, please don't stop and distract him. I want to get out of the rain please. He has a shy bladder.

  8. What makes me cranky?

    Drivers who don't know what to do at a four way stop.
    Dog owners who don't clean up their dog's "gifts" on my lawn.
    Losing an hour of sleep.
    A boring book.

    That's all for now. LOL

  9. I'm with you on loose!

    And recently, I've seen a lot of verb errors, including in AP stories, published books, etc, and I'm afraid if I again see a professional publication with anything like "he drug it across the room" or "she rung the bell" or "the ship sunk into the waves" I'm going to scream.

    And Jennifer, I totally agree about folks who don't clean up after their dogs!!!!!!!

    I'm also bugged by people who don't try to stop their kids screaming in a restaurant or store. Yeah, I know, it's hard to keep some kids quiet -- but all I ask is that the parents try. If I see them sitting there ignoring the screaming kid while my eardrums explode, I don't have a lot of sympathy...

  10. Amanda Brice11:03 AM

    When you ask for dog owners to keep their dogs on a leash, do you mean outside? Or if you go over to their house?

    Just curious. We're having people over for the first time tonight since getting our dog and I'm freaking out about what to do. I don't want to close him in a differnt room but fear I might have to.


  11. I mean outside, running free. That makes me nuts. In your house, the rules are up to you. If your guests are dog friendly, I wouldn't worry about it too much.

  12. Yeah, I agree with Kristen on the unleashed dogs. And you know, every time I've seen a dog bite someone, it was immediately followed by the owner saying "he's never done that before." Um, like that makes it okay? (That's why you keep them on a leash in the street!)

  13. Cranky, perhaps.

    But very, very funny.