Spoiling for a Fight

I suppose knowing you are in a bad mood is half the battle, so to speak. But I have to say, I have been spoiling for a fight almost all week. I know myself well enough to recognize that it's me, and my circumstances. But I also can't seem to resist the urge to throw down a gauntlet... again and again, in fact.

See the problem is my man knows me. He's been deliberately, belligerently cheerful all week. He knows I had a hellish end to February, plowed head-first into March with a chip on my shoulder, and would dearly love to bait him into a big blow up. So he has been really nice.

Big jerk.

I suppose I could fall back on my old habit of finding a rock at the very end of the Green Harbor jetty, where it's too deep for anyone to be swimming, and break glass. I like the sound it makes when it smashes on the rocks, know it won't be hurting anyone, and kind of like looking for the soft-focus, smooth-edged seaglass it will become later on. Sometimes I see an unusual shade (mauve, lilac) and even recognize it. AH! How pretty! I think that was the wine bottle of our big blow up in May of 2003.

So I have been scarce on the interwebs because let's face it, there has never been primer real estate for fight picking. And since I know it's ME, not the easy targets of weblandia... well, it's just not healthy to give in.

But man... I would dearly love to slug somebody right now. Anyone feeling very... victimy? No? K.