Friday, October 02, 2009

You know you are the worst advocate EVER when...

While I occasionally like to delve into Big Subjects on Fictionistas, I generally try and keep away from polarizing issues like politics and religion. So, in that regard, I'm not going to go deep into the Roman Polanski news this week. The subject matter is not appropriate for all of our younger readers and besides that, frankly it makes me sick. So, if you don't know the case, Google can help you out.

Instead, I'd like to tell all our readers, including the young ones, that if you say no and someone forces you to have sex, it is rape. There is no difference between "rape" and "rape-rape". There is no "there is rape and then there is rape" delineation.

If you say no, and someone forces you to have sex, it is rape.
If you are thirteen years old, you are not old enough to consent to intercourse. Therefore, it is sex without consent and you guessed it...rape.
If you are thirteen years old AND you say no, it is definitely rape-rape.

I have a HUGE problem with proclaimed Victim's Advocate Deborah Tate telling the world via Today Show interview that, "...there's rape and then there's rape...I am a victim's advocate and I know the difference."

I read the transcripts, I saw his guilty plea.. Where is the difference? What are we telling our nation's girls and boys? How is this advocacy?

So, while this is not the forum for political grandstanding, this is the forum to tell young women that it doesn't matter if you are forced by an famous adult with power and money or if you are forced by a family member or if you are forced by a stranger in an alley. It is rape and nobody has the right to do that to you. If you need help, there are real advocates who can assist you in dealing with the myriad of emotions and health issues you might encounter.

24hr. Hotline: 210.349.7273

And don't let anyone ever tell you your rights are less important than someone who hurts you.


  1. Anonymous8:14 AM

    Well said, Gwen

    Remember folks - NO means NO

  2. 100% yes. Polanski needs to serve the time, because rape IS rape. Money should not protect you from justice.

  3. 1000000% yes. I wholeheartedly agree. Gwen, THANK YOU.

  4. Amanda Brice11:35 AM

    VERY important post, Gwen. The whole thing gets me so angry.

  5. thank you for posting this Gwen. It's such an important message to get out there. We have to make certain that the kids understand that no means no. The message these stars are sending with their support of Polanski is wrong. They are using their celebrity and influence to try to justify the RAPE of a 13 year old girl. Shame on them.

    Shame. Shame. Shame.

  6. She's not a victim's advocate. And you know... the thing that breaks my heart is that his victim has never become a survivor. She was used by a lot of people. She said she "forgave" him, but if you listen to her interviews it's really quite clear that she just doesn't want to deal with this anymore. And all of her descriptions, even now, sound so APOLOGETIC. I just want to grab her and hug her til she cries it out long enough to allow herself to let that go.

  7. Amanda Brice3:05 PM

    I don't care how good of a director he is. The man is a pedophile, plain and simple. So for all these Hollywood peeps to support him and justify what he did is just disgusting.

  8. Rape is rape. I don't care who he is. Bastard.

  9. Another case of "What Gwen Said".