Let's face it. We're all thankful for pretty much the same thing--in one aspect or another. Family, friends, and food just about sums up any typical Thanksgiving speech.
And yes, I'm thankful for all those things. But there's something missing from that list that we should all be more thankful for. Something that is constantly taken for granted. So today, I'm going to say it out loud so it can't be ignored any longer:
I'm thankful for the plucked/waxed eyebrow.
It's true. If it weren't for this amazing grooming technique, we'd all look like 2-legged woolly mammoths.
Have you ever seen a unibrow up close? Once you see one, you can't look away. It hypnotizes you in its hairy evilness. And before you know it, you've let your next appointment slide. Your beautician calls and says, "Yo, what's up?" and you answer, "Dude. Sorry. I'll check my schedule and call you back." But you don't. And you don't know why.
That's the hairy evilness working its hairy magic on you.
Fast forward one month. You had a dream about Sasquatch and it freaked you out. So you go to the bathroom and splash water on your face. You look in the mirror (cue creepy Alfred Hitchcock music) and your eyes widen in horror.
O.M.G.
The unibrow is trying to take up residence on your face!
Quickly you begin to pluck. Your face stings and your eyes are watering but you don't care. You can't let the bushy brow take over. You can't be responsible for spreading the hairy evilness!
Yes, you can do your part to stop the bushy brows from propagating. All you have to do is pluck or wax. That's it. Keep the fur to a minimum and the hairy evilness will eventually die.
I'm thankful plucked eyebrows. What are you thankful for?
oh my goodness--I much prefer wax to plux.
ReplyDeletewhen you have eyebrows like mine (blond and thin), it's hard to have a unibrow. AND if I did have a unibrow, you might not be even able to tell! LOL
ReplyDeleteROFL--I'm dying laughing. I agree--tweezers are one of God's gifts to mankind.
ReplyDeleteI'm thankful for Edward Cullen and the hotty (Rob Pattinson) who played him. The stuff of fantasies I tell ya.
ReplyDeleteFunny that you should mention this. I was flipping channels last night and stopped on the movie "Legend" starring Tom Cruise and the first scene I came across was a close up of his unibrow. I know the movie was set in a fantasy land, but couldn't they have done something about that? Maybe he was cursed or they thought it added to his character... but really, come on!
ReplyDeleteEver notice that all people who work at McDonald's have weird eyebrows?
ReplyDeleteSeriously... next time you go through the drive-thru check it out.
I adore the groomed brow. Great post. More people - men and women alike - should check into waxing.
ReplyDelete