Monday, July 14, 2008

dirty little secret time

From time to time, on my personal blog, I'll admit to a dirty little secret. Like the the time I admitted to lusting after Steve from Blue's Clues. Or when I confessed that I pretended Flo Rida's song LOW was written about me.

But now it's time for me to admit a dirty little secret here at Fictionistas. I have to warn you, it isn't pretty. I'm not proud of it, but after this weekend, I have to get it off my chest. Some of you will be shocked beyond belief. I hope your opinion of me doesn't change after this confession, but trust me when I say, I'll understand if you don't invite me to your house.

You ready?

You sure?


If I visit your house, and you have your toilet paper rolling 'over', I change it to under.

It's true.. I change the direction of the toilet paper. Everywhere I go. (Birdrunner...this means you, too. I'm so sorry!)

I can not stand it when the tp rolls over. It's just NOT RIGHT. I am aware that I'm in the minority here. But I don't care. TP should roll against the wall. Period. The End.

So everywhere I go, if the TP is facing outward, I switch it around. And now I'm admitting it for all the world to see.

Do you have a dirty little secret you'd like to confess? Please share! I promise to keep it just between us and the internetz.

DUN WORRE YUR SEEKRET ARE SAFE WITÂ ME

38 comments:

  1. That's too funny. My toilet paper has to roll over. I can't stand it rolling under. But, I don't think I would change someone's if I was visiting their house. I could probably make an exception for you though. :)

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  2. I'm not sure I can have you visit if you're going to misbehave that way.

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  3. LOL Lucy! If you come over, we'll engage ourselves into a TP battle that none has ever witnessed before.

    It's an obsession. I can't stop myself.

    Under, under under!!! I feel like Joan Crawford, "No more toilet paper over!!"

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  4. KP, you like it when I'm naughty. Why would you even try to say such a thing?

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  5. Elaina Huntley8:04 AM

    All right. We are going to end up in a toilet paper war. OVER is the only way it can be.

    And I totally will change it in other people's houses when I go there. Someone has to show them the light, I mean really, they have to be clueless if they are rolling it under. *Shudder...it's like seeing dead people.* I see toilet paper...rolled under.

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  6. WTF? If you came into my house and violated the sacrosanct over orientation of my tp, it would be ON.

    And by ON I mean we'd throw wads of tp at each other and then have a mojito.

    Betsy

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  7. Dude. Mine has to be over. I'll change it back...I hate when it's against the wall!!! haha

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  8. Elaina, Elizabeth, and Rhonda,

    I realized this was a passionate topic when I chose it. I also knew I'd be in the minority when I confessed...however, as history has shown, being in the minority doesn't necessarily mean being wrong. And I know I'm not wrong.

    Let the TP wars begin.

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  9. Ugh, I can't stand when toilet paper rolls under. That's just so wrong!!!!!

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  10. *snort* Mine has to be over.

    But I'm not obsessive. Much. I don't change my moms very often... I mean, ever! I don't ever change it. Really.

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  11. I put it on under also.
    However, if anyone in my house took the intiative to put toilet paper on the roll at all, I wouldn't complain about its direction. I would be too busy making plans for the impending apocalypse.

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  12. You are the funniest woman ever!!!! I really never cared but my dh is big on over so now I'm into over but I'll be sure do go behind you and change it back if you ever come over to my house.

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  13. Gwen, I knew there was at least one other person out there who was an under!

    Lanie, Amanda, Kwana...you can go behind me and change it...cuz I promise I'll change it right back.

    I'm passionate! I'm the Mommie Dearest of Toilet Paper!

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  14. brother joe11:23 AM

    Mel,

    I'm absolutely certain we were engaged in the over/under battle when we visited...I'm over all the way.

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  15. Joe,
    So YOU were the one. Now I know.

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  16. Yeah, I'm with Kristen. I can't STAND the tp to roll from under. Ick...that's just wrong. I will be watching you, Melly-Mel...

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  17. YOU did that? Funny, someone put it under a couple of days ago and I changed it wednesday (cleaning day) because I like it when the girls fold the TP over like the hotels do with the V on the end. Then I noticed yesterday afternoon it was back again. It has to be OVER OVER OVER! :)

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  18. YOU did that?

    *batting eyes*
    guilty.

    (under, under, under!!!!!)

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  19. i want to see Mel and Kristen fight over TP. I'll bring the oil!

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  20. Feisty, your boredom is showing.

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  21. Feisty, your boredom is showing.

    she just knows a good idea when she has one, that's all.

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  22. Ugh. I'm an 'under' TPer. I won't mess with anyone else's TP, but it drives me flipping nuts when someone messes with mine. My SIL is 'over'-obsessive and has been know to pull the ole switcheroo trick on me, too. Since I bawled her out last Xmas, she won't even use my bathroom now. :)

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  23. I'm strongly in the OVER camp myself, but I haven't ever switched anyone else's TP that I recall... Though I have on occasion given them a subscription to Over Magazine: the Periodical of All Sensible People.

    BTW, I trust you at least fold your towels the correct way? ;-)

    Cara

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  24. it should be OVER! I don't want to reach my hand into the crevice between the roll and the wall to find the end! It HAS to be OVER! I look forward to discussing this over drinks in the near future.

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  25. susan, we can discuss over as many drinks as you like, I will NOT waver. Under, under, under.

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  26. BTW, I trust you at least fold your towels the correct way? ;-)

    I'm almost afraid to ask what you think is the correct way to fold towels...

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  27. Fold towels sideways first flip and then three times over, always put in closet with the folded side to you, much more presentable when company goes through your linen closet snooping.

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  28. sure, you'll flip it over but you won't replace it with a new roll...

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  29. i know this is sad, but i just put it on whichever way i'm holding the roll.

    you dirty little switcher

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  30. but you won't replace it with a new roll...


    Lies! Lies, I tell you!

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  31. Mel, do you mind explaining WHY under is better? Not sure you'll convince me, but why are you so obsessed with this concept?

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  32. Amanda,
    When it's over (even when it's folded in that uber 'tarded point) the TP tends to roll uncontrollably down to the floor.

    Plus, it looks neater when it's tucked against the wall. You don't see the edge. And you don't reach up against the wall to pull it down. You roll it back from the top then pull from the bottom.

    Finally, it tears neater. Maybe I'm just slow, but when the roll is over, and I pull it to tear, it doesn't tear properly. When it's under, it just tears straight across.

    Oh. I guess I shouldn't forget that every time I see an 'over' roll, I get a facial tick and I'm terrified my eye is gonna stick like that.

    That about covers it.

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  33. That cracked me right the heck up, Melodious one!

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  34. That cracked me right the heck up, Melodious one!

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  35. I'm just happy if it isn't on the back of the commode or on the shelf above the toilet. I don't think anyone else knows what that springy rod is for. I don't wanna know what they think it is for. Oh. And Cara, I fold my towels that way too, but they go in the closed differently, dear. I have two rows side by side of folded towels and the third row is the hand towels in the back and face cloths in the front.

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  36. (Backs slowly out of the blog)

    Not getting involved with this one. Uh uh. No way.

    ;)

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  37. As for towels, my mother wisely realized that if you let the side edges of a towel ever show, that's just asking the aliens to come and invade the earth -- so I fold in the side edges first, then fold the towel the other way after (as many times as is appropriate, particularly given our planetary climate.) :-)

    Cara the geek

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  38. LOL! Mel, you nut! You would have a field day at my house because all of mine roll over instead of under. LOL

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