Accountabilabuddies

We here at Fictionistas have decided to keep one another accountable for word-count, goals, and cetera. Having an accountabilabuddy is a great idea. I often make deals with Ahmed, because I know he will nudge me without being too gentle, but will also back off when he knows I need to ease up. It's a fine line.

I think procrastination and "getting too much in my own head" are my biggest weaknesses. In the past I never missed deadlines, never failed to complete projects, and never gave up on something I started. But I was always working FOR someone, or pleasing another person, or delivering for the "team." I'm not good at doing for myself, and never have been.

So I promised my guy I'd write him a book by the fall. I will, too. This is a project I've been sitting on a while and Ahmed wants it done. Nobody else is interested in a comedy space-opera romance. But Aji wants it bad. So I'm doing it for him, and letting my Nistas bang me on the head, too.

Who is YOUR accountabilabuddy??

Who ever said life was fair?

My husband and I have been losing weight together, using the same diet. Of course, he cheats a lot more than I do, adding extra desserts and other things not on the plan.

We've also both been working out and I don't think it's exaggerating to say my work outs are harder. He does some crunches and push-ups and maybe lifts a few weights or jumps on the elliptical for a few minutes. I spend an hour running/power walking/sweating like a lawn sprinkler, hefting weights, doing lunges, abs until I want to cry, push-ups and plank until my arms give out and guess what?

He's still losing weight faster than I am. Every pound down is a blood, sweat and tears battle for me. He slips up, eats a cookie and still wakes up a pound lighter.

It's crazy making.

But it's also life. There are people who seem to get everything they go after without any real effort - that new job, the awesome guy who adores them, the amazing book deal. You know the type. They inspire jealousy, envy and confusion in us. Why them? What makes them so special? Why don't we ever get a break?

Who knows? What I do know is that kind of thinking can take you off track and make you lose sight of your own goals. Every one of us has a path to travel and no amount of wishing will change it. What will? Hard work. Perseverance. Determination.

Forget what others are doing. Focus on your own goals. It's the only way to get where you want to go.

Goals

This is the time of year I start to think about my goals for the coming year. They don't change all that much, there is always at least one goal that includes finishing a book or two, always a goal that has to do with reading a certain number of books.

This year, however, my goals are shifting a little in their focus because this year brings me closer to the publication of my first traditionally published book with Orbit Books, Blood Rights. (It's not a YA, but I think those that like vampires would enjoy it and find it appropriate.)

Now my goals are going to include things like sussing out the best cons to go to - FantasyCon? WorldCon? ComicCon? - and making decisions about which ones I'll attend. It will also include the goal of finalizing my decision about whether or not to use a publicist and if so, which one to chose.

Regardless of these changes, my goals will be made. A year without goals has no focus and without focus, I run the risk of meandering through the days with no real purpose. Goals. Are. Important. I can't stress that enough.

One last thought - goals and dreams are two very different things. Writing a book in a year is a goal. Getting that book published is a dream. Why? Because you can control the writing, but you can't control whether or not an editor likes your work and wants to buy it. Goals are things you can influence, dreams are things that require the influence of someone else.

So. What are some of your goals for 2010? Have you set goals in the past or not? Will you be setting goals this year?

2009 Goals--How I'm Doing to Date

Since the year is half over, it's a good time to evaluate myself on the goals I set in THIS POST. Let's see how Rhonda's doing so far:

1--I'm going to find time EVERY DAY to spend by myself. Success!! I've achieved this one, for sure. Even if it's just a few minutes, I've been spending a little time to myself just reading, chillin' with a video game, or playing around on my lappy.

2--I'm going to re-study Japanese again. Um, partial success. The manpanion's taking Japanese, so I've helped him in his studies. I signed up for Rosetta Stone through work and played with a few lessons on there, as well as used our DS for the Japanese Coach program we bought. But I need to get on the ball and start doing this more for realz.

3--I'm going to read at least one new book a week (I may do a weekly post on my blog discussing the book I read--that could be fun!) Again, partial success. There are some weeks where I read a book a day, and others where I struggle to find time to finish a book in a week. I'm in a big of a reading lurch right now, but I predict it will pick up again.

4--I'm going to learn at least 1 new dinner recipe a month. OMG total, utter fail. I completely forgot about this goal. ROFL. I should get on this--it's still a really good idea, now that I actually REMEMBER it. haha

5--I'm going to plan and book my dream trip to Japan!! *sigh* fail. Too many expenses cropped up in the spring, and I couldn't do it this year without us suffering for it and having to charge most of the trip. Just can't do that right now. But I did get in contact with a travel agency and obtained a brochure, and will talk to them next year...when I hopefully have more cash. LOL

6--I'm going to come up with a sensible "diet" and exercise plan. Oy. Massive, MASSIVE fail. 'Nuff said. haha

7--I'm going to use my foot spa and massage chair thingie at least once a week. Another fail (I forgot about this one too), but I have gotten massages...and I totally got a pedi for the first time a couple of weeks ago! I am so hooked. Now that I remember this one too, I should totally do it. haha

8--I'm going to get a for-realz massage at least once a month. Mostly fail. I did get a massage in June, tho, and will plan one for this month.

9--I'm going to get a new tattoo. SUCCESS!! I rocked hard on this one...I have a new piece-in-progress on my back that I am so in love with. Each session makes it come more to life.

10--I'm going to make sure I drink at least one glass of tea per day. Mostly success. Probably 5 out of 7 days each week, I have at least one glass of tea. I've been drinking iced tea like a mutha lately. LOL

How about you--how are the yearly goals going so far, if you had any? Anything you're rocking hard with? Or, anything you have to hang your head in shame about, like moi? LOL. Share with us!

a big weekend

I turned 40 on Saturday. I know most people dread that birthday, but honestly, I was excited about it. 40 is a big deal. It's not something to dread, it's something to embrace. And I did. With gusto.

A few months ago I decided that age as all about attitude and if I wanted my 40s to be the best years of my life, then they would be. In order to make that happen, I had to take back control of parts of my life that I had let go. My health, my weight, my attitude.

I found out that the Little Rock Marathon was the day after my 40th birthday so I decided that was fate. That was the universe telling me to get off my fat, lazy bum, and get back to me. The healthy, happy me.

So in October I started training for the half-marathon. God I hated it. Every damn agonizing minute of it. I fell off the wagon a few times. Did the self-sabotage thing I'm so good at. Whined, moaned, groaned and almost quit.

But around Thanksgiving, something in my brain clicked. If I wasn't going to do this now I would never do it. And what kind of example would I set for my kids if I just gave up? So I changed my goal to run the 5K and I started pounding the pavement and training 4-5 days a week. After about four weeks, I realized I was no longer bitching about the gym. I was actually enjoying it.

What the hell had happened?

Well, I was feeling fantastic. Better than I had in years. And I didn't want that to go away.

Yesterday was the big day. I had a goal to run the entire 5K (3.1 miles). I knew it was going to be hard, the furthest I had run so far was 2.25 miles so I was basically adding another full mile to my run. Another 13-14 minutes. I didn't know if I could do it, but I was going to try.

Well, I did it.

I ran the whole way. Averaged a 13.33/minute mile and I finished in the top half of the registered participants.

I felt like a rock star when it was all over. A tired rock star, but a rock star nonetheless.

This just goes to show that no matter your age, size, or limitations, you can do anything you set your mind to. If you had asked me a year ago if I would ever run and enjoy running a 5K I would've hurt myself from laughing.

Now I'm planning to do more.

So set your goals. If I can do this, you can do anything!

I get the last post of 2008--YAY!

For 2009, I've decided to not only make writing goals/plans, but personal goals, too. Here are some of my personal goals:

1--I'm going to find time EVERY DAY to spend by myself.

2--I'm going to re-study Japanese again.

3--I'm going to read at least one new book a week (I may do a weekly post on my blog discussing the book I read--that could be fun!)

4--I'm going to learn at least 1 new dinner recipe a month.

5--I'm going to plan and book my dream trip to Japan!!

6--I'm going to come up with a sensible "diet" and exercise plan.

7--I'm going to use my foot spa and massage chair thingie at least once a week.

8--I'm going to get a for-realz massage at least once a month.

9--I'm going to get a new tattoo.

10--I'm going to make sure I drink at least one glass of tea per day.

What about you? Any goals you have for 2009? Funny, weird, serious--share 'em!!