readin', writin', & rhythm

No 'rithmatic around these parts. Nope. I save that for my day job, not my fun job, TYVM.

So, let's get down and dirty and talk about something most everyone experiences but nobody wants to discuss: losing your rhythm.

I've been separated from my husband for a year and a half. It's amicable (I hate that word) We are still very close, still good friends, and there has been very little cause for stress overall.

BUT

It's a huge life change and no matter how great we get along, there is still stress involved. And for the first time in my life, I've found it VERY difficult to read or write.

It's true. Even reading became a chore. And when reading is no longer joyful for me, you know there's a problem.

I've tried over the year to find my rhythm...to get back into my groove. But every time I sat down to read or write, I would suddenly have to balance the check book (something I haven't done in 2 years, thanks to online banking) or clean (something I've never done on purpose unless there was a party) or paint a wall, or dig a ditch, or...well, you get the picture.

Things seem to be changing for me now. I find myself plotting my new story idea in my head and playing with the characters. I'm getting more and more excited about the thought of writing. AND I've actually been reading (though the book I'm reading is kinda boring me right now. Sigh) But the point of all this (and I have one) is that I finally WANT to read and write again.

What do you do when you lose your mojo? People told me to force myself to write, but that made me feel worse. I couldn't make myself do it (now if I had been on deadline, I'm pretty sure that would've been a different story!) I really had to just let it all work out naturally. But it's taken so long, that I feel almost out of sorts now. But NOW is the time that I have to develop my new routine and force myself to stick to it...now that it isn't physically painful to try to write. Thankfully my 'Nistas have sworn to help me...or punish me if I start to slack off. I'll probably start logging my progress in my blogs here, so you guys will know if I'm slacking, too. I never want to disappoint the Internetz!

Friends in Low Places

Ever feel like the world around you has gotten too big, too scary, and too much to handle? Yeah, me too. I've been feeling a little low.

The reality is, life is not our enemy, and the world will usually be on our side if we are responsible occupants of it. But let's get real... how many days do we feel that way?

Lately I'll admit... I've been kinda freaked out. May is always a busy month. And pollen, along with the air pressure, and sudden muggy atmosphere, well... they kick my butt. I can't breath, I'm overworked, and even though things are going well for me lately, I've been a little too stressed out to enjoy it.

So, what with my guy being AWOL, I had lunch with some friends. And last week I got this really great package from my Diva-Sister Dana. And my bff Maria came by with strawberry cream coffee cake. And my friend Petie called me on my birfday and we had coffee, too. And...

Know what? The world isn't so scary after all.



Yeahhh... on second thought, it's cool. I have great friends. Family-- you love those people, often in spite of who they are. Associates and co-workers-- you care about them and deal with them daily. But that's not what a friend is.

I've been really lucky to keep most of my friends over the years. Petie-- met him on the first day of nursery school. Humpty Dumpty nursery school, in fact, which my mom yanked me out of when the teacher forced my head down on the desk during "nap time" because she saw my eyes were open and I was listening intently to her gossip session. (The length of certain mommy's skirts was being discussed.) Maria was the PA of one of my oldest friends and has become a sister. Dana is a Diva-- if you don't know about them... well, those are several thousand of my closest friends. We don't live close to one another, but distance somehow hasn't had any dominion over the affection.

So when it all gets too much, how do you cope? Who can you count on? Who makes the world less scary for you?