DEEP POV
I love Deep POV. I strive for it in everything I write. (Doesn’t mean I always achieve it, but I try.) Is it right for everything? No, but when it’s properly utilized it will help you write tighter. What is it? Deep POV is showing the scene through the character’s eyes, not watching it as it happens to the characters. Let me show you what I mean.
Shallow POV: Betty watched Bob carry the groceries into the house, listening to his grunting and mumbling with a wry smile on her face.
Deep POV: She shook her head. Bob might be carrying the groceries in, but his muttering said it all. His unhappiness gave her a perverse tingle that went all the way to her grin.
Can you see the difference? The first snippet is like you’re watching Betty in this scene. In the second snippet, you are Betty. You’re experiencing the scene right along with her.
*Filtering or distancing words will take your writing out of Deep POV, words like watched, heard, noticed, saw, felt, thought, decided, etc. I’m sure there are a few more you can think of. Do a search for them in your work and see how many you find. How can you rewrite the sentence to take them out?
*Having your characters refer to themselves by name over and over diminishes Deep POV. Do you refer to yourself by name when you’re thinking?
*Lastly, make each character’s descriptions distinct to their personality. Would a military man describe something as a gentle shade of mauve or pink? Would a female kindergarten teacher see a weapon as a Smith and Wesson 9 mil or a gun? Sure, there are exceptions in every case, but make the descriptions ring true. If those characters above answer with the first option, there had better be a reason why.
Make sense?
