Other than Sesame Street and Mr. Rogers, I have two distinct TV memories from when I was around 3 years old. I used to jump up and down whenever the Coke commercial came on, which prompted my parents to enroll me in dance classes at an early age. And I also remember watching Ronald Reagan's inauguration...kinda weird viewing for a preschooler, especially since we're not exactly Republicans in my family.
So is it really a surprise that later in life I'd work in politics and compete in ballroom dance competitions?
So last night, while I was watching Democratic Debate #471947295092 (OK, fine, it was actually the 21st debate, but hey, who's counting), it hit me. If we can't pick a nominee after about a year and a half of almost non-stop campaigning, then we're fooling ourselves. Forget about debate on policy. What we really need is good old-fashioned reality TV.
I mean, really. They've already been on SNL and The View, not to mention cameo appearances on American Idol. So I think it's time the primary process was thrown out the window in favor of combining two of my favorite pastimes: politics and ballroom.
Introducing "Dancing with the Candidates," a hit new reality show on ABC, hosted by George Stephanopoulos. We'll start small, with just a half hour segment following "Dancing with the Stars" this Monday night. Which is perfect really...it's the eve of the Pennsylvania primary, so what better way for voters in the city of the Constitution to decide the next Democratic presidential nominee.
It's totally democratic, too. Viewers would call in and vote for their favorite candidate after watching their cha-cha or quickstep. Instead of going to a voting booth in an elementary school, you can stay in the comfort of your own home...not even have to get off your couch. Can you imagine the participation we'd get?
My favorite professional dancer on DWTS is Edyta Sliwinska, paired with NFL superstar Jason Taylor this season. But she and Jason are going strong (right on the heels of front-runners Kristi Yamaguchi and Mark Ballas), so I don't think she could do this show.
So I was thinking that Barack Obama's partner could be Anna Trebunskaya, who was voted off with her partner, Steve Guttenberg, earlier this season.
And Hillary Clinton's partner could be Anna's husband, Jonathan Roberts, who left the show early after being voted off with Monica Seles.
It's perfect, don't you think?
At first I was thinking it could be a tag team type of thing, since Hillary and Barack's spouses seems to love to be surrogates on the campaign trail. I thought maybe Michelle Obama and Bill Clinton could get in the game, too. Then I realized that Bill might get a little too mesmerized by all the sequins and short costumes, so I decided against that idea.
We'll stick to the candidates themselves.
And really, dancing is a crucial skill to diplomacy. Just think of all the state dinners that are hosted at the White House. Shouldn't we as Americans have a say in who will represent us on the dance floor?
So let's throw out the primary votes in favor of something we can all agree on.
And if we're still deadlocked after this, then there's always "Celebrity Death Match."
